The Divorce Party

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It was commonly said to young women by older family members, who believed that being married was the most important aspect of a woman’s life.Taken literally, it means that being a woman with a man, is better than being a woman on her own in an empty house sitting by the wall.

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Back in the day, Arab societies considered divorce as the worst-case scenario and a terrible option for a couple. The idea that a man and woman should officially separate their lives was never acceptable.Socially, a divorced couple had a strong sense of taboo hanging over them. In both Islam and Christianity, divorce is known as a concept hated by God. It is even forbidden by most of the eastern churches as well. So if you are a Coptic Christian in Egypt, you have an even more difficult time to file for a divorce.

But today, the perception of divorce has slowly gone from extremely negative to slightly neutral. As the cultural taboo of divorce has gone down, Arab countries are facing a dramatic spike in divorce rates, and new rituals are being adopted.

Women initiate divorce According to William Doherty, a marriage therapist and professor of family social science at University of Minnesota, most divorces are initiated by women, because of the changes in women’s expectations to what a “good life” is.Women today generally expect an equal partner, who will carry the weight of marriage with her; someone who will support her pursuit of a career as well as the pursuit of motherhood.

But in many cases, men become very dependent on the woman, and that was not the intention going into the marriage. In the Arab world, a country with one of the highest divorce rates is Egypt: On average, a divorce case is being recorded every 4 minutes in the country’s courts.

A 2018 report issued by the Egyptian Central Agency for Public Mobilization and Statistics shows divorce cases in the country rose to 18,600 in August, from 18,100 at the same month the year before.

“Marriage is hard. It’s a lot of work.” Dalia, an Egyptian, told Gulf News. “As a woman in the Middle East, you are usually the one who draws the short string. Unless you end up with someone who actually will carry 50 per cent of the weight, which is rarely the case, you have to adjust your expectations. People make it seem so fun. It’s so much more than people know.”

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